The Self-Love Project

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In honor of Valentine’s Day coming up next Friday, I wanted to share some self-love journal prompts that were given to me by a therapist a few years back. They helped me a lot on my journey of self-love. You don’t need to have a significant other to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Some of my friends participate in a “Galentine’s Day” which is where a bunch of women come together and hangout, do arts and crafts, and just celebrate all the love they have for each other and themselves. Learning to love yourself is one of the hardest processes but also one of the most rewarding. It took me a while to be able to be able to sit with myself without having negative thoughts. I constantly needed a boyfriend or some sort of validation from other people because I was unable to give it to myself. 

These journal prompts listed below helped me start on a journey of learning to love the self. I wasn’t super consistent with them at first. But after a while, the words started flowing and I learned more about myself and my goals, values, and good qualities. As time went on, I focused less on all the negative traits I thought I had and more on the positive ones. I finally learned to put myself first and love myself. This journey is ongoing and I am still learning more about myself each day but the difference is that now I can look in a mirror and not see an ugly, unworthy, unlovable, or bad person but rather a smart, beautiful, talented, and kind young woman. I am proud of who I am today and who I will become in the future. Try writing a response to one journal prompt a day. See where it takes you and notice if your perspective starts to shift on who you are as a person.

ATTITUDE:

In what ways has your attitude affected your life for the negative and what ways for the positive, and how do you feel each may need adjustment?

BEAUTY:

How has society influenced your picture of beauty within yourself and, in contrast, what is your personal definition of beauty for yourself?

CONFIDENCE:

Write about a time you felt completely confident and how achieving confidence in that circumstance can then be applied to other situations?

DREAMS:

What did you want to be when you grew up and how has that changed as you have grown?

ENCOURAGEMENT:

When are the times when you feel most discouraged and what are some things people have said to encourage you or what do you wish people would say or do to encourage you?

FRIENDSHIP:

In what ways are you a “good friend” and in what ways are you a “bad friend?” What beliefs underlie these judgments?

GRATITUDE:

Write about either a time you felt extreme gratitude for someone else or a time someone told you they were grateful for you.

HOPES:

What do you hope for and what would it look like for you to live inside that hope?

IMAGINATION:

Write about what comes to mind when you think about using your imagination, whether it’s imagining or re-imagining something. Something from your childhood or anything else you think of.

JOURNEY:

What has been the hardest part of your journey so far? How did you overcome it and what did it teach you?

KINDNESS:

Write about a time when kindness, whether given to someone else or received from someone, even yourself, was healing for you.

LOVE:

In what ways do you need to extend more love to yourself and what ways do you need to extend more love to others?

MOTIVATION:

Write out a list of at least three things that motivate you and why.

NUTRITION:

If your body could talk, what would it say to you, and what do you want to say to your body (avoid shaming or negativity)?

OPPORTUNITY:

What opportunity is presenting itself to you in your life right now and what other opportunities might you need to give up in order to pursue it?

PASSION:

When is it that you feel most alive? What are you doing or feeling in those moments, and how can you fuel that to inject that passion into your everyday life?

QUIRKS:

Make a list of what you believe is quirky about you. Put a “P” next to ones you believe are positive and an “N” next to those you think are negative. How can you shift your personal perspective to make your quirks all “P’s”?

RESPECT:

In what ways have yourself or others made you feel respected or disrespected? What was said or done in those instances that can become indicators of respect or disrespect for future comparison?

SELF-CARE:

Self-care is often shown as face masks and bubble baths. Think deeper: what does self-care look like for you? From the categories of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual?

TRUST:

Detail an instance where trust was broken in your life, whether by you or someone else, and whether repair was possible or what steps were taken in attempt to repair the trust. Then make a list of why trust is important to you.

UNIQUE:

What do you think makes you unique and in what ways have you embraced or do you need to embrace your uniqueness?

VISION:

Picture you at the end of your life. What do you want the legacy you leave to be? What does your vision for your life look like from that perspective?

WORTHY:

What or who makes you feel unworthy? What or who makes you feel worthy and do you believe your worth is dependent upon external things or people and why?

XCUSES:

What excuses are you telling yourself or making to others that are holding you back from true connection or forward movement?

YOU:

Make a list of what you believe makes you YOU. Feelings, attributes, accomplishments, mistakes. Write down what makes you up.

ZEN:

Write down two or three personal mantras or meditations to repeat to yourself or to sit in silence with. Examples: “Allow yourself to be uncomfortable.” “Be in the moment.” “You are loved and worthy.”

I hope you give this 30-Day Self-Love Project a chance. In honor of Valentine’s Day coming up, let’s start by loving the most important person in our lives: ourselves. 

Written by:

Jessica Vincent