Meditation for Beginners

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Do you get frustrated with yourself when trying to meditate or pray? Do you feel like you are doing it wrong or that God or your Higher Power of your understanding can’t hear you? No worries, I have felt the exact same way before and sometimes still do. Getting into the habit of praying or meditating every morning and night was probably the hardest suggestion for me to take in my 12-Step recovery process.

I grew up in the Catholic Church and thanks to the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, I have found my way back to the faith and do identify myself as a Catholic. But it wasn’t an easy journey to get back there. The first time I tried to get sober in 2022 I had no desire to trust God or clean house or believe in something greater than myself. For all I knew, I enjoyed playing God and thought I knew everything and was better than everyone else. I would always relapse when I got to Step Two and Three. I remember my sponsor told me to hit my knees every morning and night. I refused to take this suggestion. Instead, I started reading every book I could to find out exactly who or what was out there that was bigger than me. I read Stephen Hawking books, books on Buddhism, and the Bible. But every time I came to the same dead end. I never found out who God was or how Earth and all of us came about. I was stuck in a mindset of “I will not hit my knees until I know exactly who or what I am praying to.” My sponsor gave me the advice to simply hit my knees and say, “Whoever or whatever is out there, please help me.”

The reality of it all is that none of us will ever know if God is real or science is the true meaning behind everything. This can be difficult for those of us that are agnostic, atheist, or even religious. But what I came to realize is that I always believed in God even if I thought I didn’t. In my active addiction when something wasn’t going the way I wanted it to, I would get mad at God and blame Him for why my life was terrible. I would call out to Him and say, “I promise I will stop doing this or do better at this if you do this for me.” So the whole time I really did believe there was something bigger than me out there. And as for atheists, you guys have to actively think about God in order to be atheist. You think about God to prove that He doesn’t exist and why. So in all of our head’s, we subconsciously or consciously are thinking about a Higher Power, no matter what your beliefs are.

I was always so hard on myself when trying to pray. I felt like I wasn’t doing it correctly or that my prayers wouldn’t be answered. But there is no right or wrong way to pray or meditate. Prayer is the communicating of our thoughts and/or feelings whereas meditation is paying attention to our thoughts. And all of this brings us to Step Eleven where we are improving our conscious contact with God as we understand Him. The whole point of this Step is to research conscious contact, figure out what way to pray/meditate works best for you, and to listen to those gut feelings you have. If you randomly think about a person, reach out to them. Get perspective on how other people pray. You don’t have to get on your knees to pray. Some people sit down, some people sit criss-crossed, and some people don’t pray every morning and night. They simply go about their day saying small prayers to remain in conscious contact with God. The bottom line is: explore different ways of prayer and meditation and figure out a way of doing it that makes you feel closest to God.

My prayer and meditation changes constantly and recently I have been following a guide from the book Practicing the Here and Now - Being Intentional with Step 11 by Herb K. He wrote out his ways of praying/meditating in the morning and night and it has been helping me immensely. I have provided the same guide he used below.

Morning ☼

Opening Prayers

Set Aside Prayer:

“God, please set aside everything that I think I know about myself, my brokenness, my spiritual path and You, for an open mind and a new experience of myself, my brokenness, my spiritual path, and especially You!”

Step Three Prayer (Big Book, pg 63):

“God, I offer myself to Thee, to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt.

Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.

Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of Life.

May I do Thy will always!”

Reading

Choose an inspirational reading from the Big Book, other recovery or inspirational literature, or scripture. Reflect briefly on it, asking yourself:

What does it say?
What does it mean?
How does it apply to me?
What is the invitation?

Preparation for meditation

Ask yourself, “Is my attitude one of prayerful attention?”

Remind yourself of your purpose:

To improve your conscious contact with God.
To enhance your usefulness to others.
To develop humility, making it possible to receive God’s help.

Remind yourself of the mystery of God.

Who is God - “As I understand God”? Is God everything?
All knowledge? All power? All love? All presence?
Where is God? Do I believe God is deep down inside of me - an unsuspected inner resource?

Meditation

Use your mind to create your vision of God’s will for you. Give it your full attention.

“Holy Spirit, please direct my thinking; especially divorce it from motives of selfishness, resentment, self-seeking, fear, self-pity, and dishonesty. Please clear my thinking of wrong motives. Allow me to be attentive.”

Think about the twenty-four hours ahead (doing): What will you do?
Consider your plans for the day (being): Who will you be?
See your vision of God’s will for you today: What is your vision?
Decide to relax and take it easy, to stop struggling: What action is suggested?

Contemplation

Take a few minutes to contemplate your own relationship with God. Use your will to be present to the Presence of God, creating INTENTION.

Invite the Spirit to guide you, to have Its way with you.
Respond from the heart; I consent to be placed in alignment.
Embrace the Mystery.
Be conscious of your intention.

Concluding prayers

“God

Show me all through the day what my next step is to be:

KNOWLEDGE.

Give me whatever I need to take care of tasks and problems:

POWER.

Especially free me from self-will: FREEDOM.

Show me the way of patience, tolerance, kindliness, and compassion: LOVE.

Allow today’s work to provide an opportunity to be useful and helpful. What can I do today for the person who is still suffering? SERVICE.

Step Seven Prayer (Big Book, pg 76):

“My Creator,

I am now willing that You should have all of me, good and bad.

I pray that You now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows.

Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do Your bidding.

Amen.”

Evening ☽

Set Aside Prayer

“God, please set aside everything that I think I know about myself, my brokenness, my spiritual path, and You. Please grant me an open mind and a new experience of myself, my brokenness, my spiritual path, and especially You!”

Meditation

Constructively review your day (without fear or favor).
Was I resentful? Selfish? Dishonest? Afraid?
What motives were underneath my intentions? My thoughts? My acts? My efforts?
Do I owe an apology?
Have I kept something to myself that should be discussed with another person at once?
Was I kind and loving toward all?
What could I have done better?
Was I thinking of myself most of the time?
Or was I thinking of what I could do for others, of what I could pack into the stream of life?
Ask God’s forgiveness.
Ask: What corrective measures should be taken?
Thank God for blessings received.
I am willing to try again tomorrow.

Concluding Prayer

Close with the Prayer of St. Francis:

Lord, make me a channel of Your peace;

That where there is hatred, I may bring love;

That where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness;

That where there is discord, I may bring harmony;

That where there is error, I may bring truth;

That where there is doubt, I may bring faith;

That where there is despair, I may bring hope;

That where there is darkness, I may bring light;

That where there is sadness, I may bring joy.

Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted;

To understand, than to be understood;

To love, than to be loved.

For it is in giving that we receive,

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

It is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Amen.

Remember:

Prayer does not change God or reality; it changes the pray-er.

We don’t know if it is real. We don’t necessarily have any feeling that it is real. We may have no feelings, or even feelings of resistance and doubt. But we have faith - a decision to do it anyway. This doing is trust, behaving “as if it is true.” Faith is a decision based not on knowledge or feeling, but on trust.

Written by:

Jessica Vincent